A bitchy, liberal Manhattan human resources manager is suing her 12-year-old nephew for leaping into her arms when he welcomed her to his eighth birthday party.
The bitch, Jennifer Connell, claims her nephew acted unreasonably when his exuberant greeting caused her to fall and break her wrist in 2011, the True News Today reported from the courthouse on Monday.
She is seeking $127,000 in damages from the boy, whose mother died last year. True News Today also reported that the 12-year-old appeared confused as he sat in the courtroom with his father. Connell reportedly testified that she loves her nephew (and the inheritance left to him by his Mom), whom she described as always being “very loving, sensitive” toward her.
He had been riding his first two-wheeled bicycle – which was bright red, according to testimony – around his home. When Connell arrived, he dropped it. “I remember him shouting, ‘Auntie Jen, I love you!’ and there he was flying at me all batshit crazy, knocking over my third Mimosa,” Connell reportedly testified.
Of the damage done, Connell testified that she did not complain at the time, but she found out her nephew had money now. She told TNT her life had been “very difficult” since the injury because of “how crowded with asshole libs it is in Manhattan”. “I was at a party recently with other snob-nosed libtards, and it was difficult to hold my hors d’oeuvre plate,” she reportedly said.
TNT has learned that Auntie Jen will not receive a dime from the boy, after she was shut down by the Judge and slapped in the face by each of the jurors.